What Often Isn't Discussed

I think one of the most difficult parts of my marriage has been believing that my wife loves me. And this has nothing to do with her, and everything to do with me. Something that isn’t often discussed when it comes to depression is how difficult it is to believe that someone loves you when you find it so difficult to love yourself.

And a lot of this, I will admit, comes back to my troubled childhood. My father left when when I was young, and he only reached out when he met a new woman, or needed bail money. It made family seem temporary, and I often wonder if Mel will leave like so many others have in the past. None of this is Mel’s fault, mind you, but it has caused me to go 18 years together and I cannot recall a day that I didn’t tell her that I love her.